Leah Carol - DC Life Coach - How - To - Set - Goals

When it comes to setting goals, many of us make them without giving them a second thought.

We blindly make New Year’s resolutions, #summerbod goals, or arbitrary goals such as “reading more.”

This often leads to failure because we forget about them, aren’t willing to put in the work or realize we don’t actually want it. Over time, we grow to think that we aren’t capable of achieving our goals so we go along with the status quo of letting life happen to us, rather than taking action to create our own life.

Sound familiar?

Humans are a funny breed. We do everything in our power to seek pleasure and avoid pain. We romanticize past relationships, forgetting the hard times we experienced. We imagine a beautiful future without acknowledging the time and effort it will likely take to achieve it. We do not like discomfort.


So how can we make realistic goals that aren’t doomed to fail?

We can do this by asking ourselves the following questions:


  1. Is this goal for me or someone else?

So many of us fail to realize that we often go after things to appease others. We are seeking to gain approval or popularity from family members, friends and colleagues once we reach a certain target.

“Once I lose 10lbs, then he’ll like me.”
“I’m going to get my Master’s in Engineering because then my dad will finally approve of me.”

“I need to make more money so my family doesn’t think I’m a screw up.”  

If the goal is for someone else’s approval, you are much less likely to achieve it because when times get tough, you’ll be more likely give up because you don’t have the deep internal desire to see it through.

When goals are motivated from within, we put ourselves on the fast track to achieving them.

Remember: You cannot control what others think of you.


2. On a scale of 1-10, how bad do I want this?

Many times we say we want things, but we don't often go after them with a high-level of determination because we only sorta want them. We all would like more money, a hotter bod, more friends and travel, but not all of us are willing to work for them. If they didn’t require much effort or were handed to us on a silver platter, we’d gladly take them, but when the discomfort or inconvenience hits, we toss it aside.

Remember: If it’s important you’ll make it happen; if it’s not, you’ll make an excuse.


3. On a scale of 1-10, how committed am I to achieving this goal?

Recognizing how committed you are to achieving a goal lets you know right away whether you will last during the hard times. Are you willing to throw everything at it, including the kitchen sink? Are you willing to sacrifice time, money, or your social life? Are you willing to try anything?

You may have scored your desire to take your dream trip to Thailand this year as 9, but perhaps are giving it a 6 or 7 on the commitment scale because you know you aren’t willing to skip weekend brunch and weekday happy hours so you can put that money into a savings account.

If you are fully committed, you are signing up for bumps in the road, hard days, and a timeline that may take longer than you want, but you are going to push forward regardless.

Remember: “Commitment is what transforms a promise to reality.” - Abraham Lincoln.

Author Danielle Laporte says, “If you want the best out of life, life is going to demand the best of you over and over again.” Real achievement takes commitment and perseverance that is born from within.


Pursue things of importance. You can only fail if you quit and you won’t quit if it’s important.

Leah Carol - Washington DC Life Coach - Blog

Hey, I'm Leah! 

I'm a life and business coach helping clients create extraordinary change in their lives! 

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